Where's the Firecracker?

I intend to begin my search. I'm looking for the part of me that I lost along the way. The Firecracker, at least that's what an old acquaintance said. The energetic being that could light up a room with her presence unconsciously, emitting soothing courage and sparkling optimism. The little girl who can do anything, who believes anything is possible, the charming Cracker.

I don't like what I have become after two years of trying to fit in a world where the expectations are too high in the exchange of a more comfortable life. Tasks I hated the most that I needed to do consumed me with that continuous pounding pressure in my head to exert more. "Not good enough" constantly nagging in my head and in my sleep. I feel devoid of life like an empty shell.

I will attempt to at least send a flicker of light in this dark place. I need to find the Cracker. Yes, the energetic firecracker that could explode the room with laughter and exude limitless creativity.

I will find her.